The Breeze

December 29,2009

As usual I woke up early for track practice.My sister ended up picking me up and driving me home but of course like a fat ass I am I said let's get food,I'm so hungry.I got a bagel score(: We drove home blasting music while I stuffed my face and I got out of the car in my tights dancing in front of my lawn with the neighbors just staring.My sister grabbed my bag and we went inside.


Things got serious after she closed the door.She told me to shower since I only had an hour.She didn't tell me what was going on.She left me alone..all I heard was the breeze from outside.I took a quick shower and did my hair and make-up.All this time only one thing went through my head..."What's going on?I don't understand."Next thing I knew,she showed up through the front door and asked me if I was ready."Ready for what?" she said "Come on.Let's just go."


We left and there was complete silence in the car.I didn't dare put on my iPod or text anyone what was going on.We pulled up to a florist shop and we walked in.I lifted my head up and smelled the fresh scent the flowers gave off.My sister looked at me and said "Pick a flower" I still didn't understand "A flower for what?" She just stared and said "Just pick your favorite flower and I'll buy it for you" Everything just seemed odd and out of place.She knew my favorite flower...the white rose.Why couldn't she just get it herself?


Anyways I just ignored her of what she was trying to do.I slowly walked to the roses and picked out the white rose.I picked it up and i felt the sturdy stem but the fragile soft petals.I just stared and stared because it just brought awful memories that scarred me for life.I brushed it off and we paid for the rose and left.We kept driving and I was scared of what might come next.We were heading towards the direction of where my grandma was buried.I just felt my heart dropping and pounding in my stomach.Everything was silent but all I heard was the beating of my heart.I could feel the lump forming in my stomach as I was holding the tears back.


It was happening all over again.Why?Why now?I felt like I was finally getting over the fact that my grandma was gone but my sister had to bring her back into my life.I didn't dare look up from the rose fearing we were getting closer and closer to the cemetery.We pulled up and I froze.My sister opened the car door and I felt the cold breeze against the warm tears on my face.I slowly took my seat belt off and walked over with my sister.

I knelt down on the grass having the wind dry my tears,I put the flower down and my sister was holding me close.I said all of these things that I thought I wouldn't say that made my sister cry.Enough was enough I got up and walked away,out of this nightmare and realized it wasn't all that bad visiting the past.But I still can't bear the pain I feel when it's brought up:/

"The past can be hurtful..."

nataliaa_ericaa